Something that a friend said to me.. and again came up in the books I was reading this week. Don't ask God to bless you, to give you what you want. Instead start each day by asking what you can do for God. So I have been mulling over this a lot lately. I am constantly asking God to help me, to provide for me, to fill in the gaps for me. I need Him in order to do what I do... He answers frequently with blessings beyond what I could ever imagine. Sometimes He says no. I have learned to trust. But now I am trying to start each day with asking God what I can do for Him. Instead of asking for my needs to be met, I am praying that I could do something for for Jesus. Which is mostly showing His love to my kids and the people I encounter in the day to day, it's nothing big or extravagant. It's small, little everyday things.
So then the question has been in my mind of, how then do I present my needs to my Father when my goal is to have a relationship where I am serving more than I am asking for my needs to be met. I have not come to a good conclusion.. but I had this little thing happen tonight that bolstered my faith and gave me confidence to continue on this road. So every 6 months we butcher a jersey steer that we raise. We ran out of hamburger 2 weeks ago. We eat approx 10 lbs of beef every week. So this is kinda a big deal. Today I was menu planning. I went down to see what I have in my freezers. I had a pile of freshly butchered ground sausage and scrapple(another God story for another day), some turkey sausage (yet another God story) and 2 pks of chicken, along with prepackaged burgers. Our next steer will butchered in about 4 weeks. So I said it once "God, I am sorta out of meat for dinner. Thanks for the ways You have provided before." I did not fret or worry. I was able to menu plan for the next week with what I have here. I also asked God how he would have me serve him, as my goal is to change my habitual prayers to praise and the desire to serve instead of just asking for my needs to be met. Several hours later, we were having a loud and chaotic dinner conversation when we heard someone knocking loudly on the door. It was a neighbor, I don't know them well. But they are always friendly and kind. They own a farmer's market stand. They had come bearing a bag of fresh meats!! Yummy meat from their meat stand. They had no idea that I was out of beef. They had no idea of the prayer I had breathed as I menu planned for dinner meats. They had no idea.. yet... they showed up with these blessings. Now sometimes it's hard for me to accept these gifts. Especially when I have no way of repaying them. This is not the first time they have brought meat with divine timing. I know it's just meat. But when you have four hungry preteens, it's sorta a big deal. So what I learned today is that we are to serve Jesus, to look for ways to do things He needs us to do. But He also wants to bless us. He cares about these things. He really does and if we are obedient He will give us good gifts. (Another God story) So these same neighbors... back in April on the day that would have been our 12th wedding anniversary, I had had a long day. (it's a day that is really only remembered by me, as it has little significance to anyone else.) At the end of the very long day, there was a knock on the door. I opened it to see this same neighbor family, they brought us meat and sub rolls. They had no idea, none that the significance of this day. But they had felt led, and they brought us this blessing. It felt like this little God hug..